Today’s ThinkKit prompt:

Get on your soapbox. What issue, idea, or stance were you vocal about this year? Or did you let it internally build up? Was there an event, person, or time that triggered your strong reaction? Or was it a slow-burn? Why do you feel so strongly – is it personal? Emotional? Strictly reasonable? Show us some passion – make your argument from the mountaintop!

I’m not a mom, and I don’t ever plan to be one, so my views on this subject tend to be met with criticisms from those that do have tiny humans that belong to them. But there is an issue that gets on my nerves almost daily: teach your kids how to act in public!

I know that kids aren’t always going to be perfect angels. They have bad days just like I do, they’re growing and learning constantly. Maybe being a part-time server has jaded me. Maybe it was the time that a kid shit his pants during dinner and then walked around without pants or shoes on in the restaurant entrance (vomit in my mouth). Or maybe it’s the dozens of times that parents allow their kids to have a full-on blood curdling temper tantrums screaming at the top of their lungs in the middle of a restaurant while other people are paying to have an enjoyable experience. Just because you’re used to it doesn’t mean that I am. Nor will I ever be.

I can’t even count the number of times parents let their kids run around like it’s a track meet in a restaurant and almost run right into me while I’m carrying multiple plates of hot food or a tray full of drinks. And we all know that if those plates or drinks spilled on the child it would be MY fault. WHY CAN’T YOU SIT IN YOUR CHAIR? Or get a babysitter??

When I was little, I knew I had to behave in public. If I stopped minding my manners, my mom threatened me with the familiar “don’t make me count to three” intimidation tactic. One…two…two and a half…two and three quarters…

Why would she make me wear this? Was I a sailor as a part-time job after school?

God forbid she ever make it to three, I didn’t want to know what would happen! I would shut up and sit there, no matter how angry I was or how much I wanted to act out. She’s lucky I didn’t act out more considering the ridiculous outfits she made me wear. But when we went out to dinner you would find me at the table acting like a mini adult, ordering my food, eating with silverware or reading a book.

But not the kids today. Have you ever been on an airplane and had a kid sit near you with their iPad volume on full blast? First of all, the fact that your three year old has an iPad is a problem in itself, but just because you can tune out the annoying noises from their games or awful TV shows doesn’t mean that everyone else can or will. At least stick some headphones on your munchkin and everyone would be happy!

I know, sometimes you do whatever you can just to make your kid happy because you don’t want to deal with him/her. You’re tired, being a parent is a lot of work. I get it, I really do. So can we work on manners and discipline for when you’re out in public with your rugrats? It’s time to put your foot down. You’re the boss, not your kids!

**Please, no hate mail after this blog. The email said “rant and rave” and my many years as a server have all boiled up to this blog post. I do like kids (sometimes)…I’m not a complete bitch, I swear.**